Dear Dad
by xLizziexLupinx
Summary: Teddy writes his dad a father's day letter. For my Rem :


**A/N: For my Rem :) Happy Father's day :') **

* * *

It was common knowledge that both Mother and Father's Day was hard for all those people who had lost parents in both Wizarding Wars and even harder for those who had lost both. To Teddy Lupin, this was no exception. He had been raised by his Grandmother Andromeda and Godfather Harry without either of his parents. He could sometimes, if his closed his eyes tightly and thought really really hard, see his parent's faces swimming into his mind but more than not he was sure it was his imagination.

Today was Father's Day, a day in which Teddy hadn't really let, get to him. He had always pushed the thought that he had to father to celebrate for to the back of his mind and had always continued on his day, ignoring the feeling of something missing. This time however, he couldn't just push away the fact that even though his father was dead, he still deserved to know that Teddy loved him.

The young boy had been told many stories about the infinite Marauders with James, Al and Lily when they were all together. Telling these stories seemed to be Harry's way of keeping their memories fresh in everyone's mind. He had told Teddy a lot about their two fathers and it made the Gryffindor realise that he and Harry weren't that different. They had both lost their parents when they were babies; however Harry had been brought up with the Dursley's and Teddy into a loving family.

As the morning wore on, the fourteen year old knew he had to do something. He knew he needed to find a way to tell his father that he loved him and to tell him he was proud of him. Ever since The Battle of Hogwarts, the remaining bodies that weren't buried by family members were buried on the school grounds near the lake, rows upon rows of glistening white head stones standing in memory of all who were lost. A large memorial statue had also been designed to go in the Entrance Hall, with the marked names of everyone who had died under Voldemort's or the Death Eaters hands through-out both wars; there was also a statue like this in the Ministry but it seemed no one cared for that as much as this one.

It was as the sun shone onto the pearl white stones that Teddy found his idea. He had been sitting outside with his friends when he had looked over to his parents' graves (he knew which ones they were immediately having always gone to sit by them at least twice a week ever since he had started school) and saw the way the light danced off them. He had got up quickly, telling his friends he'd be back later and hurried off to the boys dormitory where, he grabbed a quill, some ink and a piece of parchment and started writing furiously.

xoxox

About an hour later and surrounded in at least ten pieces of screwed up parchment, Teddy had what he wanted. It was a letter, one he had wanted to get perfect. Folding it up carefully, he stood in front of the mirror and changed his hair from the bright pink it was to the soft blue he thought deemed appropriate (he was sure his parents would mind him with either bright pink or electric blue hair, it was just he wanted something peaceful to go with today).

The letter in his hand he made his way down through the quiet castle, across the grounds and to where the little white stones were in perfect line. There were two other people, giving their respects to loved ones as there always were, but apart from that, this part of the grounds was empty. He carefully and quietly walked over to his parents' graves which were situated by the edge of the lake and sat down in the middle of both of them. Teddy didn't talk for a good five minutes, wanting the peace of this place to wash over him. By the time he did speak, he was alone among the stones.

''Hey mum, dad.'' He said a small smile on his face. ''I just wanted to wish dad a happy father's day.''

He turned his head to his father's grave and waited for a moment before he spoke again. ''I just thought I'd get something for you.'' He opened up the letter and placed it in front of him. A small breeze picked up a corner of the yellowing parchment but didn't have enough energy to blow it away.

''Do you want to hear it?'' The silence seemed to confirm that he could go on.

Placing a hand on the parchment to straighten out a small crease he started.

'_Dear Dad. Happy Father's Day. I didn't know what I was going to do for a gift, after all what can you accept? So I just decided to write down everything I'm feeling about this day. _

_Harry had told me a lot about you and James and Sirius. It seems I'm like you; the quiet one but full of mischief when I get the chance. He told me everything he knew and yet I still never get tired of hearing about your old adventures over and over again. Grandma's done the same with mum. I'm sure she'd told me the story about Halloween hundreds of times but I still don't get bored of it. _

_I miss you. There's no denying it. It seems weird though seeing as I never really knew you. How can you miss a person you even barely knew? How can it hurt so much that all you want to do sometimes is hideaway and just cry? I've done that a couple of times...but not many. You don't have to worry about me, its fine. I'm fine. I have an amazing family, amazing friends and go to Hogwarts, which is pretty amazing in itself. _

_Being here...it reminds me of you. It makes me wonder, what you would have been doing and have I sat in the same chair as you in the common room. I see engravings on some of the walls and I wonder if any of you made those marks. I've seen your detention file and mine is slowly becoming the same size. I'm sure Uncle James and Uncle Sirius would be proud of me for causing so much trouble. I can imagine your face now, trying not to laugh as they both congratulate me and you telling them off for egging me on. _

_I sometimes think of situations in which I wonder what you would have done. It's hard sometimes when I can't find an answer from you, or me and it makes me wonder how much of me is like you and how much isn't. I know I shouldn't be comparing myself to you, Harry says I shouldn't, but I just want to know if what I'm doing is the right thing and if it's right for you. _

_I...I just want to make you happy dad. I've been told of all the pain you went through and I hate that you had to go through that. I hate that you had to suffer for so long. It makes me so angry, like in DADA when the stupid professor said that werewolf's were vicious creatures and didn't deserve much of a life. I'm surprised I didn't get into trouble for yelling at him, but I told Harry and he made sure everything was sorted. _

_That was one of the days where I cried. I just didn't want you to have to go through all that still and I didn't know what I could do to help you. _

_I just want you to be proud of me dad. I just want you to look down on me and think 'yeah he's done good'. Have a done good now dad? Have I lived up to your expectations? Have I correctly followed in your footsteps? Because...I don't know what I'd do if I wasn't. _

_I want for some day for you to come up to me and say your proud of me and then give me a hug. That's all I ask for but it isn't enough because you're never going to do that are you? You're never coming back and it sucks! Why does this have to happen to me? To mum? To you? Who the hell in this world made it alright for you to die? _

_Who thought it was a good idea for you to die for the greater good? Because yeah it may have helped the Wizarding World in the long run but did anyone think of me? Did anyone think of how I would feel in the future on these special days meant for parents? Did anyone think of how I would feel when I didn't get to share me getting my Hogwarts letter with you?_

_It sucks, it sucks it sucks it sucks! Because even if I wish my hardest, even if I pray every single night. Even if everyone around me says you're with me, you're not! You're not here beside me, telling me stories of your school days, no Harry has to do that. You're not here to accept cards or presents for today and I hate it! I just want you here and mum here. I just want us to be a family together and to not have to go through any bad things like this..._

_Why does it have to be like this? Why can't I have what I wish for the most? I just...'_

Tears were running down his cheeks as he read. He didn't think he could carry on anymore. The ink on the page was getting blotchy and his hands were shaking a little. He closed his eyes, took several deep breaths, opened them again and continued reading, this time slower than before.

'_What if you and mum had survived? Would I have had any brothers or sisters? I like to pretend sometimes that we're one big happy family..._

_I love you dad and I love mum too and I know that even if you're not here with me physically then you're here with me spiritually. That's what Harry said anyway. He said that Sirius told him and the ones we truly love never really leave us. _

_If that's true then are you with me now?'_

A gentle gust of wind blew past him ruffling his hair slightly as though someone had just put their hand through it. Teddy wiped away the tears and smiled at the two graves.

'_I love you both and I hope you're proud of me, because I'm proud of you both. I always will be. I will never miss the opportunity to tell everyone who my parents are._

_Lots of love,_

_Teddy Remus Lupin_

_Xx'_

As he finished the letter he folded it up again, took his wand out of his pocket and turned the piece of parchment into a flower in which he placed in front of his father's grave. He made another flower and placed it in front of his mother's and stowed his wand away again. Smiling down at the flowers he whispered an '_I love you' _before standing up and walking away from his parents' graves.

He looked over towards the far side of the lake and was sure he saw two wolves, a dog and a stag in the shadows of the forest. Smiling to himself he turned away and made the steady journey back up to the castle; the place he and many others called home.


End file.
